Aziz Ansari Gets Paid to Get His Write On

Publisher’s Weekly announced via Twitter that Penguin Press paid $3.5 million for the rights to a book by Aziz Ansari. You know what that means, right?

TOM HAVERFORD IS ABOUT TO GET PAID!

The book is expected to be published in September 2015 and will provide insight into life as a single person in this entirely new era.

“You know when you text someone you’re romantically interested in and you don’t hear anything back and then you see them post a photo of a pizza on Instagram? That’s exactly what I want this book to deal with.”

No, seriously. This sounds only slightly less ridiculous than some of Tom Haverford’s business ideas on Parks and Rec. Except he’s actually getting paid. I can only hope there will be an Appendix for some Tom Haverford food names or scratch-and-sniff cologne scents included in the book. I’ll even settle for a DJ Roomba digital download.

If you need to feed your Aziz Ansari jones before then, you can catch him on Comedy Central’s Roast of James Franco on September 2 at 10 p.m. ET.

[Source: The Hollywood Reporter]