Introducing LaWhore Vagistan, The Desi Drag Queen RuPaul’s Drag Race Needs To Get ASAP

If we’re being honest, I stopped watching RuPaul’s Drag Race eons ago after LaTrice Royale unfairly lost out to Sharon Needles as that season’s winner. But centuries have passed since then, and now there’s RuPaul’s Drag Race: All Stars 2, which I also don’t watch, but I think it’s kind of like a best-of-the-best type of affair which gets the winners, fan-favorites, and probably Shangela together to compete because honestly at its core, it tends to be a great show and now that I’m typing this, I actually kind of want to get caught up again. But that’s for another time.

Listen, I need you to know about LaWhore Vagistan who, a few months ago, did this exquisite, hilarious, and brilliant send-up of Justin Bieber’s “Sorry”, appropriately named “Sari.” Watch the video first and watch all of it, because Auntie Kool Jams is also pretty awesome:

Did you watch it? Great. Now let’s get into the many genius bits and bobs about “Sari” that should automatically qualify LaWhore Vagistan for a spot in a future season of Drag Race:

  • She walks in #PurseFirst
  • Her purse contains achar, Sriracha, and other various other hot sauces
  • Chai = Tea and if you piss her off she’ll pour salt in your chai
  • #NAMASLAY is a genius hashtag and I don’t care what you say, “Sari” is responsible for popularizing it and now the rest of us need to keep it going forever until Twitter breaks down
  • All those freakin’ saris, with the on-point accessories and make-up — no other Drag Race queens could
  • We all have that one showboating auntie and LaWhore Vagistan provides a much-needed character to help us celebrate all the things that make that showboating auntie so absurd
  • In its history, no iteration of Drag Race has featured a desi queen; desi queens are ruling primetime television, comedy, and literature — and LaWhore proves that they’re a shoo-in for Drag Race, too
  • Do you have that one weird Islamophobic relative who wants to vote for Trump even though his political platform makes no distinctions between Muslim and Hindu Americans and just lumps them together as “brown people”? Great! Share this video with them on Facebook and then immediately remove that relative as a Facebook friend!

The takeaway here is that if RuPaul Andre Charles happens to read this, have your people contact LaWhore Vagistan immediately and get her into America’s living rooms ASAP.


Rohin Guha is an editor at The Aerogram. Follow him @ohrohin. Follow The Aerogram @theaerogram.

 

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